Separation anxiety can be a tricky thing with dogs. You figure they’re house broken, so you leave them in the kitchen while you’re gone. When you come back, there’s pee on the floor and the cabinets are chewed. You’re angry and so you decide next time you will kennel your dog while you’re gone. Your dog then chews through his kennel and barks the whole time you’re gone annoying the neighbors. At your wits end, you decide to leave your dog outside while you’re gone. Your dog either digs up the yard or escapes.
Anyone ever been through this?
It’s extremely common for shelter/rescue dogs to have some level of separation anxiety. Obviously, all dogs can experience separation anxiety. It just tends to happen to shelter dogs at a higher rate because they’re confused from being bounced around.
When we got our first dog, Kaeto, from the shelter, he had extreme separation anxiety. The first time he was alone we decided to kennel him because we weren’t sure how trustworthy he would be. I was gone for a total of 20 minutes and he destroyed the crate.
I also heard from my neighbors that he cried the entire time I was gone. I made a few phone calls to different trainers and came up with a method I felt would work for him. This has also worked for every dog I’ve brought in temporarily with separation anxiety.
Remember that when you are gone, your dog is very anxious. He doesn’t know when or if you’re coming back. Always keep things positive and never get mad or angry with your dog. I wasn’t working at the time, which made this easier. I would recommend planning to take a week or two off of work (if you can) when bringing in a new addition.
Now for the technique:
- Step outside your door.
- Your dog will start whining or barking, maybe even scratching at the door. Stay quiet and away from the door, but be very attentive to the sounds your dog is making.
- The second he is quiet step inside the door.
- Don’t make a fuss about being back. Just casually go sit on the couch or go about your business.
- Once your dog has calmed from you coming back in, you can give him some much needed loving. The idea is to show your dog that coming and going isn’t a big deal. It’s something that happens and everything will be okay.
- Repeat this as many times as possible during the day.
I would do this at least 100 times per day. It took a few days before he really started understanding what was going on. As he started figuring it out, I was able to gradually increase the amount of time I was gone and the longer I made him stay quiet. After about two weeks of practicing this, his separation anxiety was so much better. I could now leave the house for a few hours without worrying that Kaeto would be destructive. I know he was much happier since he was able to be calm and relax while I was gone.
Pro tip: I liked to not only hear Kaeto while I was gone, but see him too. We didn’t have a fancy home security device so I literally Skyped with Kaeto. I set up my computer to be able to see the area he was in. Then I Skype called to my phone so I could watch him. I made the screen black on the computer so he couldn’t see anything and I muted the sound on my side. This way, if there ever was an issue, I could rush back home.
For a more mild case of separation anxiety, you can leave a special treat (such as a peanut butter filled Kong) while you’re gone. Kaeto was way too anxious to pay attention to food at the beginning, but towards the end we left him with a special treat.
My precious Kaeto Potato. He died suddenly from a blood clot at only 2 1/2 years old. He was only a part of our family for about 8 months. He was the sweetest dog, but we always called him our “problem dog”. Every issue a dog could have, he did. I believe he made me so passionate about learning everything I can about dogs and helping them in every way I can. I didn’t have a job while we had Kaeto, so I spent every day working him and he was making tremendous strides. He was taken from this world way too soon, but I know he made tons of friends over the Rainbow Bridge.
Bailey was awful when he first came. Not only was he a puppy, but he had been abandoned and he was terrified at any moment he could be left again. He didn’t chew through his crate, but we had some challenging moments. Katy has her challenges but I also think it is easier on both of them because they aren’t alone when we leave.
Having a buddy can definitely help some dogs with anxiety!
Great tips! I am currently going through this with Koda. We have had him for a few months now, and I have crate trained my other huskies with great success, but with him, it has proved to be much more challenging. I will try doing the crate training more times throughout the day, and hopefully that will help. I have just ordered a thundershirt for him as well, as I have heard good things about those when it comes to anxiety. Thanks for your tips.
ღ husky hugz ღ frum our pack at Love is being owned by a husky!
I learned very quickly that Kaeto just wasn’t a “crate dog”. It made his anxiety even worse so we ended up scratching the crate completely. I was able to find moments between the crying to come back inside much easier (even if it was just him taking a breath, he was quiet). My neighbors probably thought I was crazy as I walked in and out of my door 30 times during 15 minutes 😉 I’ve heard great things about the ThunderShirt as well. You’ll have to let me know how it works for you!
I have a friend who called me just yesterday wanting suggestions on her new pound puppy with separation issues. I will pass along your techniques since they are better than mine.
Hopefully, this can be helpful!
Oh, that is so sad about Kaeta.
Good post. Both Buddy and now Marcus have separation anxiety. Both were dumped on their own at 3 – 5 weeks of age. Thankfully, neither are destructive when I leave. Buddy howls and has taught Sam and Merci to join him. Marcus squeals like he’s being killed.
I’m pretty good at being left alone although the neighbours say I howl. Mummy and daddy have waited outside to try to catch me at it but they’ve never heard me do it.
So sorry to read about Kaeto xx
Huskies are pretty good at howling 😉 Kaeto had the most adorable howl.
What a helpful post! My mom’s dog went through a major separation anxiety period and it was so difficult!
I think your advice is perfect! The part about taking two weeks off from work is probably the best idea possible. I know not everyone can do this, but even if you can take two days off to make a four-day weekend, that could help.
I’ve had foster dogs with bad separation anxiety, and unfortunately I had to find them different foster homes due to my work situation and living in a townhome with close neighbors.
I think your technique can really work, though, and I like how you pointed out you really do have to do this 100 times per day to get it to click. That and lots and lots of patience, staying calm, etc. All the things you mentioned. Great post.
Thanks for the positive feedback! Any extra time you can stay home with a new pup is always helpful. I think we sometimes forget that these events are life changing for dogs and they need time to assimilate. Hopefully, a few people can use this post to help lessen their dog’s anxiety.
Im so so sorry to hear about Kaeto’s passing. What a precious looking guy he was and its great that you stuck by him through so much. He was a lucky dog
retro rover
I feel lucky that we’ve never had a dog with separation anxiety as it’s a tough one to handle. Your method seems exactly appropriate though – gradual introduction. That’s sad about Kaeto, sorry for your loss. I’m sure he appreciated his time with you.
All of my dogs have loved their kennels. I would love to get rid of ours but Prince would probably birth a cow! I’ve never had a dog with severe seperation anxiety but these look like really great tips. Thanks for sharing them 🙂
Kaeto had a good life with you way better than that happening to him in the shelter. I have separation anxiety too, but haven’t been too destructive and do bark some when I am alone. Mom has never worked since adopting to me so I became very attached to her. She practices ignoring me when she comes home a lot and I get the message! Love Dolly